Direction?

         This is an open letter, to all who wish to read.  I am very distraught in my time here.  I have just about everything that anyone could want in this world.  Yet I am depressed beyond belief only because I know I am not fulfilling my purpose.  As a man my job is what I do, I just can't wrap my fingers around the fact that I know I am working where I don't belong.  This leaves me feeling empty.
I am always so happy and grateful for everything, but with being sick and depressed most the time, it is hard to put motivation to work for me and achieve the goals I have set for myself.

        It is my desire to personally meet and help others find what their life purpose is, a life coach.  To be able to work with someone who wants to achieve more in their lives and help them reach the top, wherever it may be for them.  Truly my gift is with people, and I need to use it.  There is no reason for me to be depressed so much, other than my chronic migraines I am perfectly healthy.  I have a beautiful wife, with who I have been with for 8 years.  Two wonderful sons, age 3 and 1, a rescue greyhound who I adore, a very affordable but more than necessary house that is big for my family, amazing relatives who are proud of me and happy, plus some of the truest friends a man could ever ask for.  I have no reason to be melancholy except in the area of work.  Which is another thing, I love my boss, who I consider more of a friend than a boss,  who has given me everything I could ever need, including a great paying position and benefits, but if I am not fulfilled, so I need to ask myself, is that everything?

        I am quite thankful for all of these things.  Especially when it comes to my job.  Although, I will not feel the joy that I need to feel unless I am helping others through their careers and tough times.  I want to help people achieve their dreams.  I need to be mobile, always in motion, always talking and helping other people.  I cannot be stagnant, immobile, this adds to my despair.  So I wake up this morning, and take my responsibilities into my own hands, to dream a bit more and act on my thoughts.  If I must change things than right now is the best time to do that.  So I choose to walk on my own, through a ever changing world.  To soldier on for a true cause, my cause, to make me whole.

What do you see in your present?

Dreams and goals. Goals and dreams.  In school that's all everyone used to talk about.  What are you going to be when you grow up?  How many times have we heard that.  It seemed different back then, like we were going to choose our destiny, instead it seems our destiny chooses us.  If you have had a passion in your life that needs to be fulfilled do not rest until it has come to pass.  Your life will be meaningless without the completion of your dream.  We cannot be content with mediocrity and being comfortable.  To achieve more often we must risk more, and when it doesn't work out, you pick yourself up with a smile and keep going.  Your not a failure until you quit.  Take pride in your dreams, and make them work for you.  Break all of the barriers and norms of this life, if you want to be or do something bad enough then nothing can stop you.  Remove the barriers and fulfill your destiny.

Do you want to be successful?

        Of course you do.  I have never met anyone who didn't want to achieve more in their lives.  But the main thing to remember about success is it isn't some magical, unobtainable thing.  It is really more of a perception of a certain thing.  One person my see success as raising a happy family and having a good job, while another my see financial abundance and the freedom to have the time to do as they please.  So it really does boil down to what you are currently seeking out of 'success'.  Then all you have to do is go get it.  Did that seem like it was too easy, well it is that easy.

        Start with a vision, whether that be a business you would like to start, or a product you would like to invent, and start laying the ground work, the foundation for that endeavor.  With a good foundation anything is salvageable.  Work to lay that good start and consistently and constantly gather the knowledge and resources you need to complete your foundation and start the next step.

       Then, as momentum helps you along continue building your vision, whatever it may be, you will probably want help along the way.  This is the place where you would reach out to others who have already done something similar to what you are doing.  Let them mentor you, take their advice and put it in to practice.  Keeping you self positive and consistently holding a good attitude will help maintain your momentum.  Don't let negative thoughts cloud your judgements.  Stay strong.

     Finally using your knowledge, deliver your product or service to the public.  Make quick decisions based on facts, not feelings or snap judgements.  The last thing you need is to get stuck in limbo, the back and forth thoughts about decisions.  You have achieved your first win, and you must learn how to make important decisions and not second guess yourself.  If it was the wrong choice, at least you stepped up and made the choice.  Indecision grows instability and fear, and often causes a leader to lose trust.  If you make a poor choice, stand by it, do not excuse it, pick yourself up and learn from it.


     Keep yourself positive, and upbeat.  Work hard and never stop.  Apply what you have learned and do so consistently and effectively.  Then nothing can stop you.

Why you are a failure.

Well, I am being sarcastic here.

 I do not believe anyone should be a failure.  Although the key to figuring out where in life you want to go lies within your own mind and soul.  If you feel you are a failure, the way to eradicate that feeling would be to first recognize that you are this way.  Second thing I would do is write a list of all the positive things about my self, and then the negative things.  Be honest, brutally honest.  Its a tough thing to do but on the page where you write will reveal the facts that show everything.  What your list will show you is exactly which habits in your life are destroying you and which ones are creating value in you life.  The goal is to list those good and bad habits in order of importance.  Which negative habits are destroying you the most, start there and list down.  Which habits are the best, write them down in the order you think is most important.  After you make your prioritized lists.  Look at only the top two things, one on each column.  Now comes the hard part, making a plan or an organized routine that cultivates the positive behavior, while you either stop the negative, or slowly wean yourself off of it, whatever it may be.

You see, when it comes to being successful, you must make conscious decisions.  How could you be mad a someone who worked everyday to be successful, when all you did everyday after work is eat, watch TV and fall asleep.  When they got home from work they ate, studied, or maybe invented something in their garage and started selling it.  Now they have extra money, and you sit there and look at them and say, "Its not fair".
When in all reality, it is fair.  They worked everyday, first to feed a vision that they had, then to turn that vision into a reality.  They made conscious decisions to better their lives and worked toward that goal.  So don't be bitter about how they achieved and you didn't.  They just adjusted their habits, they altered their routine.  Then they made conscious decisions in their daily lives that ultimately changed their future for the better.  Don't get stuck in making decisions on auto piliot.

The keys to being successful, isn't some wizard fairy tale or hocus pocus.  It is a daily change that you make in your life, and over time, those daily decisions build on each other to bring you to your desired outcome.  Which of course works the other way to, laziness and unorganization can become habits that will surely lead to a future of stagnation and bitterness.  That is why it is so important to destroy bad habits, set a daily routine, and most of all importance,  stay consistent.  There is no momentum gained with inconsistency. 

John Maxwell once said, "You will never change your life until you change something you do daily".

How to change

To make a positive change you must change the way you think.  It seems pretty simple to wrap your head around.  Yet the reality is that too many in our society are way too 'busy' to slow themselves down and observe then act.  Often people just react to duties, situations and circumstances.  Instead of assessing the situation and parlaying their thoughts into a action plan that they can decide upon at that moment, they either react prematurely or they make no decision at all, creating either a explosive situation or a stagnant one.

If you understand what I am trying to say, to positively change you must train your brain to think differently.  So your 'auto-pilot' doesn't kick in when something happens.  You need to become real, slow down, and become the reality you want to be.  There are no limitations, anything you believe you can achieve.  I know these are all well used motivational poster quotes, but people are usually too busy to even think about them, let alone let them sink in and actually change their lives.

You can sail through life miserable at your present situation, your job, your health, or whatever.  Or you can focus on the right things, positive things. Be grateful for everything, at least you have a job, a home, are alive to enjoy things, look towards the future and envision your goals laid out there.  Ready to be achieved, able to be reached with just a little more focus, a little more work.  Positive people are always planning for something in the future with great expectations, negative thinkers only concentrate on how miserable their present circumstances are. 

Reassess your thinking and do not be afraid to reach, and set far off goals,  you will make a change.

http://www.attitudedriveslife.com/the-happiest-guy-in-the-world/

Why you are not Patient

Look at your self for a second.  Make that a minute.  When was the last time you just sat down and had a good time of introspection.  Patience is probably one of the hardest things to learn yet once you realize that it is mandatory to have, you will wonder how you ever got along without it.   Here are three things you can do to help improve your patience, with out the headaches or other bodily harm.

1. You must realize that we live in a world that is controlled by rules: these include laws of physics such as gravity and thermodynamics.  These laws do not care if you believe in them.  The live in reality, do you?  You must acknowledge the fact that we are responsible for our own actions in this reality.  Strive to disconnect yourself from the distractions all around- excess of music, new , television, i phones etc. 
- Distractions hide you from your true self and your true meaning, find your self, find your meaning- limit distractions.

2. To add patience to your life have a family: Those who are closest to you can be the ones who try you the most.  It is in these life learning lessons that you must; 1. Think clear 2. act accordingly 3. implement the correct action using wisdom .  It isn't easy or fun.  Especially when your mad and you just want to stomp your feet and throw something ( someone) against the wall.

3. After you have clear depiction of who you are, and the wisdom to deal with situations on a case by case basis, you have one more hurdle to hop over.  That is those two words that mean a great deal: ego and attitude.
Exercising patience cannot be done by someone who never admits fault or is never wrong (ego) or by someone who thinks negatively about every facet of their existence. So smile, gauge yourself  and think before you act, it is easier than you think.


http://www.attitudedriveslife.com/the-happiest-guy-in-the-world/

Areas of Purpose

          What do you do in your job?  I hope anyone who is employed can answer this question.  This society in which we live is doing less and less to train others to be gainfully employed.  So many come out of college with bachelors or masters degrees and cannot be hired, due to lack of common sense.  I believe this to be a major issue today's business owners face.  They see a flood of  'candidates' who have the paperwork that says they are qualified but inhibit no work ethic, some have very little basic morals, or they come to an potential employer with an entitlement mindset.  Instead of thinking how they can attribute wealth and prosperity to the company, they only desire for how much the company can do for them.

       Let me get this straight there is nothing wrong with a degree, it shows dedication and focus.  But over they last 35 - 40 years alot of colleges have been more interested in teaching their beliefs instead of the actual academia in which they pledge to give.  I respect those who attend college and work very hard to achieve their goals in this life but I just think there is too much effort put forth on ' good grades' rather than learning common sense and other life benefiting attributes.  

      Although it is frowned upon by some business leaders, empowering employees to gain knowledge in every aspect of the company can, by far, be one of the most beneficial things an employer can do.  By inspiring every employee to manage themselves or co-manage their team on a rotating basis, you break down that pesky labor vs. management mentality, and really open up the dialogue between teams and people. Giving your employees creative control over their assigned tasks turns them from a stagnant worker only good at one thing, into an motivated, empowered worker who has greater control of his 'job', creative control over his duties and increased control over his wages.

      Slowly try to integrate the team concept into your business, by integrating management into your teams, allowing rotation of management duties on a weekly or biweekly basis.  Then open up your employees to gain greater responsibility by increasing the control that they have over how they perform their tasks.  When they show greater motivation and increased productivity show them gratitude in return by increasing their pay.  Integrate each employee into your business to help them gain knowledge in their area of purpose.  Show them how to gain more responsibility, slowly give them the ability to do more.  Most cases they will succeed and feel that they have purpose in the company instead of just a job they go to everyday.

Ignore the Real World

You see it everyday, a creative person gets a great idea and before you know it they are never talking about it again.  Today I am here to tell everyone how to ignore the real world and concentrate your focus on your passion, whatever it may be.  You can turn your passion into a job and make yourself money off of it but you must do a few things first. 

        First,  a person MUST find their passion, the one thing they were made to do, and that they are happy most when doing it. ( Warning: Do not identify a addiction as a passion, that gets ugly).  Dig and dig to unearth your youngest childhood dreams that have been buried under a landslide of mundane jobs and menial tasks.  Think back when you were a child, and how there were no barriers that could hold you back.  You must learn to think this way again and find your passion.  Once you do that, you can plot a direction.  Think about a compass, you may be going in circles until you plot a course, pick a direction, and stick with it.  You make no progress until you do so.

       Second, once this passion is found we must organize around it.  This is the crucial part, learn everything you can about it.  Get inspiration from speaking to others who have done this particular thing or something similar.  Take notes, gather information.  Then is the hard part, turning this passion into its monetary equivalent.  Alot of people get stuck here because of lack of start up capital or seed funding.  This is where on must reach out to others or dig into his savings and set up shop on a shoe string budget, if possible.  It is so easy to give up at this stage.

     Third, succeed on purpose.  Don't let obstacles, situations or doubters slow you down or make you second guess yourself.  This is where we ignore the real world.  So many people are trapped in their daily ruts of coffee, news, crappy bosses, ungrateful spouses, unruly children and so on, that when they hear someone talking about their awesome dream and being excited about it, they get jealous.  So naturally they want to tear you  and your fragile idea down, to see you hurt, maybe, but just so they can feel better about themselves.  For this situation I have one word of advice:
           
       Your passion is yours, do not let the words of an unsuccessful person take that from you.

Go and make this world a better place, ignore reality and do what you where born to do.

The Little Things

As pertaining to selling, the little things may overtake everything.  Every salesperson is trying to please their customer.  In my experience it pays to remember. Literally.  You can deliver everything you promise, provide excellent transition, and information about your product or service and it won't matter.  In the mind of your customer you are only doing your job.  There is nothing considerably special about how you treated your guest of honor, the person giving you money.  The only thing the customer may remember from the buying experience with you is that you were knowledgeable, polite and efficient.  Not how I want to be remembered. 

Try This.  Go all out with your customer, seriously, he is putting your kids through college after all, deliver an experience to your customer that they will be raving about, and never forget.  It works better if that is a positive experience not negative.  If its negative you'll be out of business soon.  Nordstroms once accepted a customers return of four tires even though they never sold tires. It pays to go above and beyond.  Remember first names, if they have kids, what hobbies they enjoy.  Then go out of your way to make some one feel special.  Send them a thank you card.

You may be surprised at how many salespeople DON'T think of any of this.  It can be downright scary, and we wonder why salesmen get a bad rap, its usually a stereotype brought on by selfish motives and unethical people.  Case in point, what is the first thing you think of when you hear me say; Used Car Salesman?  Watch your wallet right,  well maybe, its a tough job, commission only but those who have integrity will find ways to make their monthly sales numbers without crucifying their ethics.  I am good friends with a few used car salesmen, their great people who have been doing it for many years, they are honest and ethical.  They treat their customers in a way that the customer wants to be treated.  They remember that and come back.

That's how you do it.  Deliver that WOW experience.

You won't regret it.

REALITY CHECK: Why your employees are miserable. (Part 2)

The second part of my Blog shows how a outdated pay structure does very little to motivate your employees.  Think about it, you created the business, it is your burning desire.  It would be safe to say that most of your workers do not feel the same passion about working their jobs.  It's ok, if it is not their passion.  That is where you have to get creative in your pay structure.  They are there to make you money, but for 95% of them they are there to make themselves money.  Support their families.

      I do not appreciate hourly pay scales simply because they were created over a hundred and  thirty years ago.  When workers had very little, if any, say in their salaries.  I think it should be a bit different in today's society.  Any good leader knows how to ultimately motivate an employee, you show them a difference in their pay.  That increases productivity.  Replaces the hourly scale with either salary plus commissions, or salary based on production would help in most jobs today.

     Lets take a simple example, a cashier, she works 40 hours a week and is paid eight bucks an hour.  She is going to go to work everyday, waste her forty hours for the same pay that she would make whether she works hard or slacks off, where is the motivation.  People are usually lazy so we must always be properly motivating them otherwise they fall into ruts of uselessness.  Now if you pay that same cashier the same 16,640 dollars she is making already every year, but throw in the option of bonuses for customer compliments, and every new credit card they get opened.  Then you inspire your worker to push to make an impact on the customers every single day.  Because that motivation is there every hour of her shift.

    Make it easier to please your employees and keep them motivated, happy and wealthy.  The more extras you offer them to be able to achieve the more they will increase their production. 

It is simple supply and demand.

Reality Check: The reason why your employees are miserable.

Why do so many people despise their jobs?  Why are are so many seemingly ungrateful for the money they are earning every week?  The answer is buried under a sea of business rules and stereotypes of which most can be unearthed and disproved.  I will try to show you how to keep you employees happy, or even more so, productive.

Most of the problems workers face comes from a combination of two things. 
               The first is they do not know the creator of the business, the top boss, they most likely have never met him or her.  Therefore they equate that lack of interest in them as impersonality that the boss doesn't care for their employees, since they are 'never' around, and especially have never introduced themselves to their subservient 'kind'.   Of course as the leader of your business you do not think this way about your employees.  But it may be how they view you.  As their leader, the creator of the business, you hold the power to encourage, inspire and pass along the same zeal that you have for the business.  All this can be accomplished by knowing your employees, caring about them, get to know them on a personal level.  You will be surprised at how much an hour or two a week devoted to knowing your employees can help things like moral and productivity.  Oh, and they will get to know you too, at a personal level, instead of the stereotype that they have of you, the evil boss sitting behind his massive oak desk, trying to squeeze every penny for profit, while he whips his workers for more time and less benefits.  I know, I'm getting carried away.  All I ask is spend and hour or too a week, every week, shake their hand and thank them for what they do.  If you don't think they deserve that, think of this.  They are devoting the most precious commodity of their life to your benefit, the time that they are alive on this earth,  the best years of their life for most cases.  What you are paying them will never make up to the quality of 'time' they are spending working for your business. So try to appreciate them some more.  It will only help your bottom line in the long run. 

Trust me.

The Second thing I will write about tomorrow.  But for now, get out their and find out whose working for you. 

If you run a large corporation, make a few random phone calls every week and introduce yourself.

10 Things you should know by the time your 30

In this life we learn some things as we go, other times we actually listen to advice that is given to us.  Whether that advice is good or bad.  Here is a list about life I mad up and thought I would share with everyone.

10. Found out that partying and growing up often go in different directions.

9.  Realize that great friends are hard to come by and stick by them through anything.

8.  Although you will let people down, don't continue that way, discover the way to show them how you
    can grow and change. 

7. Love for real once in your life and never forget it, that will help you love again, never stop showing your
    affection for that person.

6.  Realize that everything your children see you do is something they will accept as ok, even if they are
     young.

5.  Discover your own country first before touring others.  The U.S. holds so much beauty it is a shame to
     think some will never know. 

4.  Drive instead of fly.  Take the old route instead of the interstate.

3.  Learn and grow everyday.  Read. Spend time with your family. Discover a new kind of music.  Do
     something you are afraid of.

2.  Realize that time is a tool and once it is gone we cannot get it back.

1.  WITH EVERYTHING THAT YOU DO TELL YOURSELF, " IF THIS IS THE LAST DAY
     THAT I AM ALIVE, WOULD I BE HAPPY WITH HOW I LIVED, OR DID THIS OR THAT
    

I play hockey, and I do not get to play often so when I am out on the ice I tell myself, " If this is the last time I ever played would I be happy with how I played?"

If I am not, I play harder.  If I am I can just smile and know that I threw it all up in the air to give the most that I had. 

I just want to do that everyday, whether in business, work, family, marriage, parenthood, friendship.

WHY ITS REAL

            Often we look at others thinking that they have everything in this life and we are lacking.  Maybe a nicer house, maybe a newer car.  I implore you to stop looking at others in this world, and focus on living yourself and your family.  Find the things that are most important to you, hopefully they are things that build value to your life and not take away from it. Everyday should be a day in which you learn something new, or share something new with another. 
            Think of an actor,  the best actor becomes his character, not just a portrayal of  his character.  He actually becomes the character he is playing.  We must do this in our businesses.  As business leaders we must be the leader we want to portray.  Not just play the part we must be the part, don't say your a good leader, show it.  Strive for those things that are important to you, if you want a new house, go get it.  Set plans to achieve such things, don't just expect it to happen.
            Your business should be an extension of your life, it should be your passion.  If you are working in a job that isn't your passion you are probably miserable or unhappy with the job.  Find your passion and pursue it, don't stop in your striving to find what makes you happy, create your own job which includes your passion.  You see this is how that brilliant actor can act so well,  he is the character he is playing because it is his passion in his life to do so. 

          So I beg you make your life real.  We only get one time around on this bluish/green spinning ball.  So lets make the best of it and make it our passion that drives us.  Make your life REAL.